April '98

As the world Churns
The official BBS of Amish Rake Fight on the DALnet


Churn out a Post?


A Butter Patty from:
on Wednesday, April 01, 1998 at 12:32:30 (PST)

Hi All!!!! its been a while since I have visited ARF, been busy with work, kids and god know what else, hopefully will see ya'll again soon, just wanted to say Hi to everyone! so here it is HI EVEYONE!!!! have a good day Love ya'll

Lisa

P.S. and look at me first one this month LOL


A Butter Patty from:
on Thursday, April 02, 1998 at 10:22:09 (PST)

Man, I wanted to be the first this month, now I'll have to be all pouty-faced till May.

I just wanted to nip another rumor before it spreads too far....I have no comment about the Cartman paternity suit....and I have no comment about the large monetary transfer made from my account to a Swiss Account in Matt Stone and Trey Parker's names.....I have no comment about Mr. Garrison....and if you have any further questions, please refer to my publicist.

hempy


A Butter Patty from: sugarmagnolia1
on Thursday, April 02, 1998 at 10:41:43 (PST)

shit.....that makes me #three...oh we.. i will jion hempy...=(


A Butter Patty from: sugarmagnolia1
on Thursday, April 02, 1998 at 10:42:39 (PST)

join that is.....hehehe


A Butter Patty from:
on Thursday, April 02, 1998 at 14:07:47 (PST)

In regards to the channel wars:

CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG??????

Thank you.

PeaceKeeperLuna


A Butter Patty from:
on Thursday, April 02, 1998 at 16:37:34 (PST)

There are channel wars? Damn, I miss all the good stuff.


A Butter Patty from: LedPipe
on Thursday, April 02, 1998 at 19:17:52 (PST)

Pssssssst , I remember Hempec hanging around with a chick, last name Cartman, a few years back. He said they were just friends. We all drank a lot in those days, can't recall how the whole thing ended up. Maybe with a little more therapy things will become clearer. Hey whatever you do dont tell him I told you about this. God knows what he's capable of.
Did I ever tell you about the time...................................


A Butter Patty from: OggieMon
on Thursday, April 02, 1998 at 19:31:29 (PST)

I saw a tree today and said hello to it.. It seemed happy and it made me feel
the same... So I cut it down... As I have had enough of that....


Neurotic Hai-Ku



A Butter Patty from:
on Thursday, April 02, 1998 at 22:36:42 (PST)

Hey YellowSmiley;)

You sure that wasn't suppose to be..."In regards to the Channel Whores:"

and MAN we have some strange people on the CHURN!!!!!! J/k you all are FUNNY FUNNY

Fitzie


A Butter Patty from: Ehcin
on Friday, April 03, 1998 at 10:09:38 (PST)

Hey guys ... long time no see just checking in


A Butter Patty from:
on Saturday, April 04, 1998 at 22:20:38 (PST)

I love the Neurotic Hai-Ku.

Just in time for National Poetry Month too : )


A Butter Patty from:
on Sunday, April 05, 1998 at 18:59:53 (PDT)


Finally the cyberspace can hear the band NIGHT TRAIN online! woo hoo!

check em out!!

http://members.tripod.com/~ntrain/

you will need REAL PlAYER to listen.

thank you

shameless promotion of husband's band

luna


A Butter Patty from:
on Monday, April 06, 1998 at 11:53:24 (PDT)

NATIONAL POETRY MONTH???????????
*SLi openly salivates*
LET THE GAMES BEGIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


A Butter Patty from: DaRakers
on Monday, April 06, 1998 at 14:19:14 (PDT)

ooooh my poetry contribution....

I saw a disk up in the air...
a silver disk that was not there...
3 more weren't there again today
Oh how I wish they'd go away...

From the walls of a NASA bathroom...

eeheh laters... :-)


A Butter Patty from: dave
on Monday, April 06, 1998 at 22:31:10 (PDT)

might as well throw my oddly decorated hat into the poetry ring...here's an almost-haiku I saw on one of the stalls at the local Denny's...

have you ever masturbated
and felt bad about it afterwards?
isn't it a victimless crime?

tee hee...it struck me as kind of appropriate in some sense...I'm not sure quite how, though.


A Butter Patty from: hashimoto
on Tuesday, April 07, 1998 at 10:11:28 (PDT)

Today is Geffen's Birthday.
How old is the guy?
I've seen dirt that's not as old.

Thank you,
Hashi


A Butter Patty from: hashimoto again
on Tuesday, April 07, 1998 at 10:15:17 (PDT)

Tammy Wynette is now dead.
What will she do now?
Tammy will lie by her man.

Thanks again,
Hashi


A Butter Patty from:
on Tuesday, April 07, 1998 at 14:24:13 (PDT)
You should look at thisweb page.

Roses are Red


Violets are Blue


Goat's Milk is sour


But it sure makes good fudge



Thank you

luna


A Butter Patty from: Slick Nick
on Tuesday, April 07, 1998 at 14:53:09 (PDT)

Mother nature has been kicking our asses with floods, hurricanes, typhoons, poison monkies and the like, once we start to get some ground on mama nature with our own Bombs, floods, and poison monkies. Now all these tree huggers are all like "oh no! we've gotta help the enviroment" why the fuck is that?


A Butter Patty from: Slick Nick
on Tuesday, April 07, 1998 at 14:54:50 (PDT)

Mother nature has been kicking our asses with floods, hurricanes, typhoons, poison monkies and the like, once we start to get some ground on mama nature with our own Bombs, floods, and poison monkies. Now all these tree huggers are all like "oh no! we've gotta help the enviroment" why the fuck is that?


A Butter Patty from: sker
on Tuesday, April 07, 1998 at 14:54:57 (PDT)
You should look at thisweb page.

Stars and thorns
Their points both rip at my psyche.
Tattered and torn
I never stop looking.

(topic by luna)


A Butter Patty from:
on Tuesday, April 07, 1998 at 15:01:16 (PDT)


Next topic:



Squash seeds

have fun with that one!



A Butter Patty from: sker
on Tuesday, April 07, 1998 at 19:43:44 (PDT)

Now
I watch as my nose bleeds
crimson searing down my wretched face.
looks as though
I've jammed way too many squash seeds
into an unforgiving place.


A Butter Patty from: LungLuna
on Tuesday, April 07, 1998 at 19:57:28 (PDT)

Squash seeds hot
Squash seeds cold
Squash seeds in sker
Nine days old.

Thank you

luna


A Butter Patty from: The Amish Joke-ster
on Wednesday, April 08, 1998 at 12:52:10 (PDT)

A carload of "do gooder" tourists were driving through the Amish country in Lancaster, Pennsylvania. They came upon a buggy pulled by a beautiful big stallion.

As they passed they noticed a heavy cord tied to the stallion's balls, running back to the buggy.

They stopped in a manner to block the buggy and got out of the car.

As they went back to the buggy they gave the Amish men who were driving, holy hell for cruelty to animals and proceeded to cut the cord.

After they got back into the car and started to drive away, one of the Amish men looked at the other and said, "Well, there goes our passing gear".


A Butter Patty from: Return of the Amish Joke-ster
on Wednesday, April 08, 1998 at 13:08:01 (PDT)

Amish Worker
What do you call an Amish man with his arm up a horse's ass?
Answer: A mechanic



A Butter Patty from:
on Wednesday, April 08, 1998 at 23:01:11 (PDT)

I once new a girl named Kay
She was as bright as a sunny day
She dressed in purple and lace
And she had such a lovely face
There was none as sweet
a person could ever meet
Ill never forget her smile
because you could see it for miles.


A Butter Patty from: Mort Mortified
on Thursday, April 09, 1998 at 09:06:42 (PDT)

Just so you know--
Kay was a sheep.

Mort


A Butter Patty from:
on Thursday, April 09, 1998 at 10:32:44 (PDT)

What's George Michels' next song gonna be called? Suck Me Off Before You Go Go?


A Butter Patty from:
on Thursday, April 09, 1998 at 21:58:04 (PDT)
You should look at thisweb page.

(Warning: Shameless self-promotion ahoy)

Hi gang,
I finally added two new stories to my Unspeakably Stupid Stories website, #11 & #12, go check 'em out if you are so inclined. That is all. Thanks.

Doc


A Butter Patty from: dave
on Thursday, April 09, 1998 at 22:21:23 (PDT)

I'm drunk. I GOTTA write a poem, the spirit is TOTALLY taking me...

so many napkins
spread out all over
the underneath of my eyelids
no wonder they're so bloodshot.


A Butter Patty from:
on Friday, April 10, 1998 at 06:16:46 (PDT)

How BIG were the napkins Dave?

*SLi giggles and ducks waiting for the rest of the barn dwellers to throw tomatoes at her for getting that started again*

Smooches and Slurps
SLi-ness


A Butter Patty from:
on Friday, April 10, 1998 at 06:17:03 (PDT)

How BIG were the napkins Dave?

*SLi giggles and ducks waiting for the rest of the barn dwellers to throw tomatoes at her for getting that started again*

Smooches and Slurps
SLi-ness


A Butter Patty from: Silly SLi
on Friday, April 10, 1998 at 06:18:05 (PDT)

damn it I muffed it up


A Butter Patty from:
on Friday, April 10, 1998 at 06:22:25 (PDT)

Uh....huh huh huh.....what is "muffed"?


A Butter Patty from:
on Friday, April 10, 1998 at 11:46:07 (PDT)

Rabbit Stew
Rabbit Stew
Eat it on Easter
How nice!

Thank you

luna


A Butter Patty from: dave
on Saturday, April 11, 1998 at 14:05:17 (PDT)

so big that they just launched into orbit and crashed into Mir, completely obliterating the superstructure and killing everyone inside in the cold vacuum of space.

that's all.


A Butter Patty from:
on Saturday, April 11, 1998 at 17:36:29 (PDT)

Green Devil
Blue Death
Jehovas Witness
Aerobic Fitness
Crystal Meth


A Butter Patty from: sharky
on Saturday, April 11, 1998 at 19:07:08 (PDT)

ahem.. a poem..

Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
Niteraven eats grapes,
and is Cartmans father too.

Thank you.


A Butter Patty from:
on Sunday, April 12, 1998 at 11:17:05 (PDT)

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE!! MAY YOUR DAY BE FILLED WITH HAPPINESS
Sincerely Carl Felty


A Butter Patty from:
on Sunday, April 12, 1998 at 12:29:39 (PDT)

I would like to take this time to not only wish you all a Happy Easter, but to publicly apologize to Glen Stew for my skepticism over his kitchen prowess, which was quickly dissipated when Sharky showed up in channel and gave me the exact same instuctions that Glen did, which turned out to work nicely. Also, I told Glen to shut up twice. Sorry, Glen!

Doc, with hard-boiled egg on his face


A Butter Patty from:
on Sunday, April 12, 1998 at 12:36:48 (PDT)

A brief Poem:

Titanic, Titanic, you sinkable boat,
On Leo's woose shoulders you attempted to float,
That is why today I'm able to gloat
That is why today this poem I wrote!!!

Woohoo!!!!

Hempy


A Butter Patty from: Ty Tannick
on Sunday, April 12, 1998 at 17:36:51 (PDT)

"woose"??


A Butter Patty from: Dr. Nick
on Monday, April 13, 1998 at 19:33:25 (PDT)

I wonder something.
If everyone had one big orgasm, would the force cause the world to end?
I'll have my men look into that.
Excuse me a second.
Yes, Tico? Were gonna start on the orgasm theory.
Yes, Nix any other plans.
Okay, bye *Beep*
We also think the orgasm has the power to create interdimentional portals.
E-Mail me for job details


A Butter Patty from: Rob's Non-Gay Sheep
on Tuesday, April 14, 1998 at 19:09:49 (PDT)


Starcraft


IS OUT

8)



A Butter Patty from:
on Friday, April 17, 1998 at 09:28:23 (PDT)

I have waited all my life for this very moment!!!!!!


A Butter Patty from: MonopolyChamp!
on Sunday, April 19, 1998 at 18:11:45 (PDT)

Woo Hoo!!!!!!!!!!!! AdmAckar and Sharkbait, would you like a rematch????


A Butter Patty from:
on Sunday, April 19, 1998 at 18:15:01 (PDT)

Just so ya know:


I am now a strawberry blonde not by choice!


A Butter Patty from:
on Tuesday, April 21, 1998 at 00:26:17 (PDT)

You gotta stop falling asleep in the strawberry fields.


A Butter Patty from: OggieMon
on Tuesday, April 21, 1998 at 21:49:24 (PDT)

Nightraven double dared me to try to get WWN to make an animation of BatBoy taking
a shit... Here it is...



Dear Sir or Madam,

I am a student of geneology that for years has been stumped by a
disfiguring ailment that my Uncle Luke had (who was alive from
1932-1987). And much to my suprise, there he was as your "Bat Boy"! I am
not in posession of any pictures of him as a child but it looks exactly
like him! I was wondering if perhaps this was just a freak hoax on the
the part of WWN that you chose to draw a figure like my uncle or if it
was, in fact, a true (dare I say it) possibly related, flesh and blood
being?!
I can truly say that I do know one possible way you could prove
to me (and I would be willing to release you pictures of my uncle) the
authenticity of your "batboy".. My uncle had a very specific way of
defecating. And if you could describe this to me, or perhaps animate it
like you did batboy running, I could then be sure. We always knew Uncle
Luke was not a blood relative, but it would be great to give you all our
information in hopes to help you with BatBoy..
Please forgive me for my need to authenticate this, but I feel I
need to be sure that I am not just supporting an artists imagination
with my family information...

Sincerely,
Gus DeMoranville




A Butter Patty from:
on Wednesday, April 22, 1998 at 14:56:35 (PDT)

Hey everyone here I am at my friend darren's house and he's showing me his WebTv which is really kewl, anyways thats all:)


A Butter Patty from:
on Saturday, April 25, 1998 at 00:16:25 (PDT)
You should look at thisweb page.

Okay,
Just updated the Home Page some. Here are the specific file names just added, for those of you wanting to put your pic above your post:
glenstew.gif
oggie.jpg
sugar.jpg (sugarmagnolia)
edzeppelin.jpg
jed.jpg (Jed_Clampit)

Thanks,
Doc


A Butter Patty from: Jed_Clampit
on Monday, April 27, 1998 at 09:49:19 (PDT)

Let's do the time warp again!


A Butter Patty from:
on Monday, April 27, 1998 at 09:53:34 (PDT)

It's just a jump to the left.....Then a step to the right....put yer hands on yer hips....and bend yer knees in tight......But it the pelvic thrust...that really drives em insane.....Lets do the time warp again! (don't forget the pelvic thrust)


A Butter Patty from:
on Monday, April 27, 1998 at 09:56:13 (PDT)

those with a bad back problems should take it easy with them thrusts.( I know from experience)


A Butter Patty from:
on Monday, April 27, 1998 at 15:04:23 (PDT)

Speaking of overdoing it...


A Butter Patty from:
on Monday, April 27, 1998 at 21:11:26 (PDT)

BAT BOY! BAT BOY!!! EXCELLENT!!! (In Wayne's world fashion)


A Butter Patty from:
on Monday, April 27, 1998 at 21:13:22 (PDT)

I SUCK!!! I SUCK!!! I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!!! EXCELLENT!! (Again, in Wayne's World fashion)


A Butter Patty from:
on Monday, April 27, 1998 at 21:16:36 (PDT)

yeah I know it's alittle much....I can't seem to get in the chats...stupid webtv...aways doing something like this....webtv I should beat you with a rake!


A Butter Patty from: Steve Handjobs
on Monday, April 27, 1998 at 22:49:47 (PDT)
You should look at thisweb page.

Then one day, Jed was shootin' at some tube, and up from the ground come-a bubblin' fool...
(Bill, that is. Bill Gates. Microsoft and WebTV fuhrer...)
Well the first thing ya know ol' Jed's a losin' hair,
The #ARF folks said, Jed, dump Windows if you dare,
They said "Cupertino is the place you oughta be,"
So he bought himself an Apple and the rest is history.


A Butter Patty from:
on Tuesday, April 28, 1998 at 17:59:14 (PDT)

I am having the worst week of my entire life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


A Butter Patty from:
on Wednesday, April 29, 1998 at 22:36:56 (PDT)

Umm.. It's about to get worse.... I'm pregnant...


A Butter Patty from:
on Wednesday, April 29, 1998 at 23:22:13 (PDT)

LOL who gave Jed a gif?!?! Just kidding. I hope Luna is feeling better.


Instructions for Churning out a post - READ OR RISK HAVING YOUR POST DISAPPEAR!

Fill out the form to add a post.

Your Name :

Your E-Mail address (optional) :

A link to share with others (optional):

Your message: ( Enter will be replaced with a <BR>-tag )

View last month's posts?

Browse the As The World Churns Archives?

Back to the Rake Fight?

You are the visitor to theChurn since 2-8-97.